A Happier Anniversary

Twelve years ago today, August 30, 1997, Bill and I were married in Sevierville, Tennessee right across the street from the court house and a statue of Dolly Parton. Time has flown by!

We look so young! Bill was malnourished, my how times have changed!

I was only 23! My cousin made the bouquet and I still have it.

GYM

Isaiah had gym class yesterday and he asked me "mom, how are you at push ups?"
That is so sadly hillarious I just can't tell you!
I told him "Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha". I can't even do push up bras anymore. I'm beyond that!
He said he got out because "It's strike one, strike two, strike three, you're out". I guess they have to do push ups and that's what the gym teacher does when they can't complete one.
To that I answered "OOOHHHH hurt me!"
I mean seriously! What is the gym teacher thinking here? Isn't the kid that can't do it the one who needs to keep doing it?
Do you think if you told me to drop and give you 20, that when I tried 3 times and couldn't do it that it would at all make me feel bad that I had to quit. Not quite!
Hello! I am the kid who lost on purpose during high school badminton single elimination tournaments. Thankfully my best friend Julie was in my gym class and she was as much as a gym class underachiever as I was! I mean seriously! It's badminton! Do I want to keep playing or go sit on the bleachers with my best friend and chat for the next 5 weeks? HMMMMMM!
Looking back I was way too smart for my own good and was genius at getting out of doing things! Besides, who remembers who won that tournament anyhow?!

How we celebrated

This is how we celebrated Naomi's crappy anniversary.
First, I colored my hair. My roots were out of control and I've decided I'm done getting it colored. It just grows too fast and I don't have time to go get it colored constantly.
Then we went to where I get my hair cut because I thought I had a 10:30 appointment. I didn't. It's Friday
Then we came home and I made Naomi's 11:00 meal and she ate it up, no problem.
Then about 11:30 or so I put her down for a nap and I laid on the bed to read. I could hear her belly churning from 8 ft. away.
She woke up early, about 12:30 so we came downstairs and she wanted to sit in my lap. So I held her. She threw up on me.
I waited until 1:00 and called the pediatrician's office to make an appointment. I called them yesterday for an appointment. Called them back to move that appointment back an hour. Then called them this morning.
I was trying to get an appointment because I'm afraid Naomi's has a blocked bowel. She's not going poop at all like she should and last night a bit of a "plug" came out and she felt so great. So this morning when she felt better I just cancelled the appointment thinking everything was going to start moving as it should. Then she vomited and I was afraid that the plug was just the tip of the iceberg and so I called the pediatrician back. They probably think I'm nuts!
The doctor said it wouldn't hurt anything to do an x-ray so we went to the hospital for x-rays. This all sounds great but let me add. Our doctor appointment was for 2:30. It was just before 3 when she came in and so I had been in a small exam room trapped with a screaming child for about 15 minutes. A screaming child who was mad and was biting my shoulder and hands, and trying for my face. She just wanted out. Then she figured out how to open the door and when I closed it again, she took it up a notch. I was so happy to see the doctor.
The hospital got us checked in and we headed to x-ray where she was actually happy for a time to be in that waiting room. Then we went to do the x-ray and she had to stand in front of a board. Then lay on a table. Two x-rays were to be done. They checked them before we left and the standing one was missing half her side. So we sat her on the table and took it that way. Oh joy ,what fun that was.
Now it's 3:30 and she was supposed to eat at 3 so that's part of the tantrums. We got in the car and some idiot was pulling out of the hospital in front of me (probably a Dr.) and he throws his van in reverse! Hello!!! BEEP BEEP BEEP. I was laying on my horn. Where did he think I was going to go? There was a car behind me! I came home, thankfully it's maybe a mile away. When we got home outside waiting was Papaw and Daddy so of course she starts with "HEY HEY HEY" all happy to see them.
I told Bill to get her out of the car and I ran in the house and fixed a quick hot dog and fruit meal, the quickest thing I could think of. Isaiah asked me something about corn and didn't hear my reply three times so I sort of raised my voice the 3rd time I answered him and he cowered and I told him sorry but my nerves are SHOT! I can actually feel my arms quaking I'm so stressed. Now Naomi wants to be all lovey and get up and down off my lap and I just feel like a nice glass fence about 3 feet around me on all sides would be great for a while! Plus some sound proofing.]
I had the choice of either staying at the hospital and waiting for the x-ray results (No chance in hell that was happening). Or waiting for the radiologist to read them then he'd contact our Dr. and she'll call me later (Yes, please). So that's what I'm waiting on now. Actually as soon as I wrote that the Dr. called. There's no blockage but there is a lot of poop in there. It's below the colon so a suppository my be more effective. She also told me if I had to I could go up to a full 18 G dosage of Miralax if needed. That's an adult dosage. If that didn't work I don't know what would. If you've ever taken Miralax you know what I mean! Well I better get off here, I've got a suppository to give.

Crappy Anniversary

Today marks exactly 2 years of daily seizures for Naomi.
I think in all that time she's had 3 seizure free days.
Hopefully one day we'll be on the other side of this monster and be celebrating 2 years of being seizure free.

My Daily View

This is what I look at pretty much all day long

The diet has calmed Naomi. Instead of being this little ping pong ball, moving all over the house all day long, now she wants to be on me. Close to me. Very close. She's even taken an interest in my eye lashes and eye brows. If I could just get her to tweeze my brows!

Here's a photo that shows all her hair! I don't leave it down often but here it's got 2 little pigtails on the side then the back is all down. It lands at the bottom side of her arm pits.

I must also add this. As I write Bill is sound asleep on the couch and it made me think. In this house it's not "You snooze you loose". It's "You snooze, you run the risk of being beamed in the head with something". Naomi woke him slightly by tossing the remote at him.

Book Report

I hated book reports in school. Thankfully I was an artful cheater who used the same book report for several years and could read a book cover and come up with a pretty convincing work. I wasn't one of those dummies who tried to do a report on a movie that had been made into a movie, such as Annie.
My love of books didn't bloom until after school when I could read what ever I wanted and didn't have to pick from the school library. If I like a book I am compelled to read every book ever written by that author.
I just finished reading the best book I've read so far this year. It's called The Crowning Glory of Calla Lily Ponder by Rebecca Wells. She also wrote The Divine Secrets of the Ya Ya Sisterhood, which became a movie.
I loved this book. There are so many little words of wisdom. Such a loving relationship with her parents and brothers, friends.
The main character called her mother M'Dear, which is such a southernly sweet thing. The book is set in a fictional Louisiana small town and I won't give away a single thing!
One example of the little things written that are so wise is on the first page, chapter one when the main character says her M'dear taught them "not to care much what other people thought, unless someone said you were mean to them, and it was true. Then you better pay attention."
There's a part in the book somewhere where M'Dear tells her something like "good enough is good enough, don't drive yourself crazy trying to make it perfect, no one is perfect". I know people who's whole lives could have been changed for the better is their parents would have told them that.
There's also a part where she tells her to practice spotting angels every day. Meaning to tell her that there are people sent to you, to teach you something everyday.
I loved this book so much that I was trying to take a nap while Naomi slept and kept thinking "If they make this into a movie, who should play each of the characters?". I've set my heart on Faith Hill and Tim McGraw playing M'Dear and Papa. Neil Patrick Harris playing Steven, and now I'll have to look though IMDB to find the others.
This actually may be a book I love so much it'd be hard to watch as a movie. You know usually the book is so much better than the movie. Except, I have to say, The Notebook. I liked the movie way better than the book. Probably because I have this totally inappropriate crush on James Gardner.

The Last Weekend

This is the last weekend before school starts and I am really hating it.
Even though Isaiah could stay in his room building Legos all day and only come down for lunch or to watch his sister, I'm going to miss him!
I hate sending him to school. I really really hate it!
I just remember the feeling of who will I sit with at lunch, who will I play with at recess. I just hate that. He thinks he'd love to be home schooled, but both of us could turn into hermits very quickly! He and I do not need a lot of interaction with the outside world.
He's spending his last weekend with his Grammy and Papaw. He's pretty much got free reign to go to their house any time it's available to him. Since Dad got sick I just really feel like he can go when ever he wants! He can spend as much time as possible with them.
You should see what all he takes. A rolling back pack with his clothes, a basket with a big stack of drawing paper and about 50 pens, an old diaper box with Legos and a big stackable plastic storage drawer full of more Legos. They're only like 10 miles away. Sometimes he even takes his PS2. Oh and the movies! He plans special weekends. Different themed weekends. Spiderman, Batman, Indiana Jones or Star Wars. Or Grammy's favorite Pirates of the Caribbean. She just loves Johnny Depp.
Oh well, I guess growing up is inevitable!
Summer just flew by! He's gonna be a 5th grader!

Charlie and Lola

Naomi woke me up pretty early today but I don't mind. When we wake this early it is the only time I get to watch Charlie and Lola on the Disney channel. I love this show. These little kids have English accents and Lola is so cute. It's really sweet because Charlie is the older brother and so patient and kind to his little sister. This clip is a whole episode. Watch long enough to hear the accents though. Charlie always starts the show talking about Lola. It's sweet.

Going Bald

My dad's hair was falling out because of the chemo so he had it all shaved off yesterday. Isaiah thinks it's hilarious. Because my Dad still has a lot of body hair Isaiah told him he looked like a bald gorilla, which made Dad laugh.
When we got home from Cleveland yesterday I talked to my Dad and he sounded a little sad and I told him what I'd seen at the clinic.
When we walked into the clinic yesterday there were two girls who were maybe 13, if that. One girl had a scarf wrapped around her head, obviously chemo had done a number on her hair too.
I told my Dad he's lucky to have kept his for 60 years. After seeing that girl and how she's spending her summer vacation how can you not take a break from worrying over the side effects it's having on a 60 year old who refuses to quit working even though it's wearing him out. He did finally talk to a supervisor and ask if he could be excused from working the 10 hour days and only put 8 in. Of course they agreed. They would have agreed weeks ago if he'd just have admitted he couldn't do it (especially in this 90 degree weather!)and asked.
Dad said he's never felt so bad as he had since starting chemo. I think a lot of it is depression and being tired. He's having trouble sleeping and that doesn't help, it would affect even a healthy person.
It is what it is. You either take the good with the bad or let the bad overtake everything without a fight. Of course that's easy for me to say, it's Dad's fight. I'm just glad he's fighting. His father died of a brain tumor. He had bad headaches and when told to go to the Dr. he'd say "why they'll just tell me it's a tumor". He was right and that's what he died of. I don't think he ever took any sort of treatment for it. Of course that was in the 1970's and treatment was archaic compared to today.
I guess because I worked at a nursing home when I was younger and saw a lot of death I'm just not scared of it. It's more of the process that's scary and it's hard on those of us left behind, trying to figure out how to go on. But go on you do, the world has yet to stand still because any one person died, even Jesus.
I think Dad will always be with me, and that's a comfort. Hopefully chemo will help and add a few years onto his life. But this whole experience has made me stop and think, and realize that he will be gone one day. Whether it's 1 year or 20 it'll be hard.

Our Routine Trip to Neurology

We had to go back to Cleveland for a routine EEG and follow up with the dietitian and neurologist. I was thinking about cancelling because July was great for Naomi then some changes were made and her molar started coming in and she went down hill. I figured we were wasting everyones time and the EEG would just be more of the same. It wasn't it showed IMPROVEMENT! She's not seizure free by any means and I knew the EEG would not be normal but I am thrilled that she's taken a step in the right direction.
I'm going to tell you all this mumbo jumbo and just play along like you understand.
There was no _________ I can't think what the Dr. calls it but it's good that it's not there. :)
There was no spikes, no seizure pattern just some spots here and there. The brain activity is slow so that's why we're seeing the developmental delays and probably has something to do with the underlying cause (unknown) of her seizures.
I told the Dr. people always ask if she'll outgrow them. I feel like, if she does... GREAT! but I'm not planning on it. I'm working towards her being seizure free at some point but for now, it is what it is. The Dr. said it's not something we can predict right now.
Naomi SCREAMED through the whole EEG, from marking her head to glueing on the electrodes. She fell sound asleep, then had to be waken because the test was done. Then she screamed some more when they took the electrodes off. The nice EEG lady made sure she got the gunk out of Naomi's hair and even combed it and put it in a pony tail.
The dietitian and I decided to go back to a 3.75:1 ratio for Naomi's diet. I think that on that ratio she is more regular in her bowel movements and that effects a lot of things for her and her seizures were better at 3.75:1 than they are at 4:1. Plus her BHB, which is the ketone level in her blood stream didn't change one bit from 3.5:1 to 4:1 so why deprive her of those good carbohydrates!
They all thought she seemed more calm and was extremely interactive and social. Actually she tried to climb up into everyones lap. Even some guy on a cell phone in the waiting room. She's all for trying out a lap and if you're near a computer where she can tap on the keyboard all the better. She kept putting her hand out at the Dr. and smiling like "hello friend". It was sweet.
I was talking to a mother in the waiting area who had a 3 year old there who saw the same Dr. we do. She told me she took her daughter to Colorado to see a Dr. about her seizures and he looked at her chart and who her doctor was and told her she couldn't get a better Dr. So back to Cleveland they went. I knew we had a good Dr., a great Dr. actually but it's nice to hear stories like that. She also said she called and talked to Martin,( the clinical nurse we used to also work with before the diet) her daughter had 4 seizures back to back and he told her to get to the ER. She told him they were 45 minutes away and he told her GET HER TO THE ER. So she threw her girl in the car and drove to the ER and when they got there Martin was there waiting on them. That is dedication! To your job and to the patients you care for.

Shopping... not so bad

I took Isaiah to Kohls to get some Levi 550s because that's what fits him best. At first I couldn't find his size so I had him try on 3 other pairs. One fit but not great. I finally found his size in 550 and had him try a pair on and they fit! YIPPEE that'over!
Bill told us to look at shoes while we were there. So that was the last thing we did. Isaiah needs 8.5 in mens. I took him over showed him the different shoes. He tends to go for the tennis shoes that look more like hiking shoes. Anyway, he saw some he liked and I said "lets see if they have your size". So I'm looking and he said "How much are these mom?"
I looked at the little electronic tag and said "$59.99"
Isaiah said "Sixty dollars for a pair of shoes!? I am NOT spending that much on a pair of shoes. I was going to tell Dad I HAVE that pair of tennis shoes from Walmart that are fine. Why fix what ain't broke!", and he walked off.
So we didn't get shoes.
I did stop and pick up a pair of jeans for Bill. Isaiah asked why we were shopping for Dad. I told him I have to buy Bill's clothes because if I don't he'll want to wait until Levi's are $19.99 again, and that is not going to happen! I told him Daddy's a little lost in how much clothes cost because he never has to do the shopping, he still thinks stuff is at 1995 prices. Like in June when he wanted Nike tennis shoes, but didn't want to pay more than $30.
Oh well, I buy his clothes and make sure he doesn't buy some tapered leg jeans. He's lost in style too! :)

Back to School Shopping

Well I've gotten the school supplies.
Pencils, erasers, colored pencils, scissors, ruler, dry erase markers, red ball point pens, 5 folders all different colors with clips and pockets. This is the first year I haven't had to buy crayons or glue. Oh, I can't forget the paper towels or Kleenex, they actually specified Puff's or Kleenex.
Now we're on to clothes. I don't buy much at the beginning of the year but a day will come where he needs a pair of jeans that fit and I'd like to have at least one pair.
In case you don't know, it's Marvel comics 70th anniversary. I didn't know until a trip to Old Navy yesterday where Isaiah picked one t-shirt out of a very large selection. They also put a reprint of the original Spiderman comic in our bag.
Isaiah now has 3 t-shirts with marvel comics. We got 2 from Target but it wasn't until our trip to Old Navy that I knew something special was going on with Marvel. They kind of throw it in your face!
I hate buying jeans for him (and for me). I don't know who they make jeans for? Isaiah needs husky, but even they don't fit right. The really skinny kids have a hard time finding jeans too. So where are all the kids who actually fit into the jeans?
When I can just go to a store and buy his jeans by waist and length I will be soooooo happy! When he can go pick them up himself, I'll be even happier!

A day at the movies

I never get to go to the movies. Bill and Isaiah went to see G.I. Joe, which they really liked, and told me about this upcoming movie. So for all of those who, like me, don't get to go to the movies and see the trailers for new movies.
Enjoy

Sunday School

I told Isaiah that Sunday school would resume in September. He said "Um, I think I'll just stay upstairs. School school is bad enough. I don't want to have to go to school on Sunday too."
We'll see about that.

Dad

My Dad had his first chemo treatment about two weeks ago.
He's still working but it's getting to him. His job is on 10 hour days plus 8 hours on Saturdays and my Dad works through his breaks! Always has. My husband works with him and takes him water and such and has tried to tell him to slow down. Even his boss has said take a break when you need to. But Dad won't let them down. If it needs done he'll get it done. I think Mom is going to contact his Dr. and get them to give him an order that says he can work no more than 8 hours a day. Maybe if it comes from the Dr. it'll take it out of Dad's hands and he can relax some.
He didn't get really sick from the chemo and actually felt a little better on days. The problem is it's just like when Naomi was on meds. Anytime anything happens it's like, OK, is this meds or is this disease? He's really emotional, maybe even depressed. He's really quick to tear up. I don't know if that's chemo or hormone treatments. I told him he sounded just like me after I had Isaiah and I wouldn't feel sad but tears would just start rolling down my cheeks and I had no control over it. He's wore out in the evenings. He told my mom he's just so tired and she told him he ought to be tired! He's 60 years old and trying to work like a much younger man!
His appetite doesn't seem to be affected. He doesn't look sick in any way.
The Clinic sent him to the heart clinic just as a precaution to be checked out and have an EKG this week. I guess there were quite a few characters there that day including an older man who kept saying "Frank is in the building". Referring to himself :)
Next week he goes to the Clinic to have a dermatologist check out a spot on his face that has caused problems for quite a while. It may be melanoma.
Then the following week he goes back for another chemo treatment. He'll go every 3 weeks. Hopefully we'll have good results.
Last Sunday in church when they asked for prayer requests it was heartbreaking! Several people with cancer, a mom with postpartum that tried to commit suicide, a family who's father had been with the same company for over 40 years and just found out the company went bankrupt. So many sad stories these days.
My cousin is about 2 years younger than me. He has a brain tumor, 2 mortgages, 3 kids and was caught in the latest round of lay offs at his job (he works with my Dad and husband).

Happy Birthday Dad

Sunday was my Dad's 60th birthday. My parents came over Sunday and I made supper. We had BBQ ribs, fresh corn on the cob, baked potatoes and black raspberry pie. Isaiah picked out the pie. I was going to make a blueberry cream pie but the farmer's market had no blueberries this week. Isaiah said "why don't you just buy one mom?". The thing is, in most places a bought pie just wouldn't be the same as home made. But here, we have Amish! Wonderful, home baker's who sell their goods for a fair price. I paid $5 for the pie. My dad loved the pie. Isaiah picked that flavor because somewhere in his brain he remembers long ago that my dad got a black raspberry ice cream cone. The kid doesn't miss a thing!

Before Dad left I gave him his cards. I guess he got a chuckle at the "present" I put in his card. A crumpled up one dollar bill. He just doesn't know what he's going to spend it on. He told mom he was going to save it. You just never know what little thing will make someone happy!

August 2 we all got up and went to church. There are plenty of churches to pick from in our own town but this is a special church. This is the church some of our extended family goes to. My Grandma Naomi had a cousin who's family has attended this church for quite a few generations.

I think the board said 49 were in attendance last week. That's the kind of church I like! I don't go for these mega churches. There's a lot of older people there. Lots of farmers. One man had an awesome farmer tan. It looked like he had white glasses on! Another man is 80 and still holds a season pass to Cedar Point where he goes several times a summer and rides all the roller coasters.

While we were upstairs in church Isaiah was downstairs with the kids. It was our first time at that church so "Uncle" Mel took Isaiah downstairs. They decorated construction paper T-shirts. Isaiah's was yellow (his FAVORITE color) and it said "Cartoon Network" on it. I said "know what he's done this summer?". That kid loves cartoons. He loves drawing and watching them.

After church was coffee hour. The church's motto is "we don't meet unless we eat". There was a nice spread of food. Way more than just coffee! There was quiche, breakfast casserole, fresh fruit, blueberry muffins and grapes in snow (brought by my mom). While I was eating Isaiah came and said "Mom. You know that blonde kid? He says he's my cousin". I told him he probably was. Mel informed Isaiah that he was probably related to 3/4 of the people in the church in some way. Isaiah smiled and ran off.

When we walked in to coffee hour Isaiah said "Wow Mel is way older than I thought". Which made me crack up! He's seen Mel a few times over the last couple years. Isaiah just doesn't remember people well unless he sees them often. Mel's actually a 3rd cousin, not an uncle. He's just 1 of seven kids so he's uncle to a lot of the kids! Plus almost everyone calls his parents Grandma and Grandpa, they are the ideal grandparents.

I told Mel what Isaiah said, he's only 46 and he kept kidding Isaiah. While in line to eat he went to grab a blueberry muffin and said "is this something an old person would eat?" and Isaiah got tickled! It ends up, what Isaiah was talking about was this photo of Mel. Isaiah apparently thought this yearbook yourself photo that I made of Mel was a real photo! He thought Mel was in High School! Thank goodness none of that is true. Can you imagine how badly he'd be picked on if he looked like this? He's actually a mortgage loan officer.

We sat and ate for an hour then headed home. It was a great experience and I'm sure we'll be back. Even though it's an hour drive.
But we sure didn't leave hungry!